1 May 2016


Time crawls instead of flying nowadays. I bet is due to the reason I am suffering but not enjoying my current university life. Well, not fully actually. I still delight in having exams and acquiring new knowledge about the field that interest me. You can say that study life is much more relax compare to event life or doing nothing.

Anyway, today I went for a movie with my Housemate. His name is Shamir, from the name itself we know he his a malay la. Still, the only problem now is language barrier. It is a saddening truth that Malay is not my cup of tea. I hardly speak or write in Malay and when I speak or write with it, I can disappoint way to depress an entire village in Malaysia.

I understand his feelings, like a nomad. Belongs to nowhere. Daily routine are just connecting to people in the past or people within his own race. He too wish to explore new things that never fail to amazes him in life. He too, wish to search a new refuge in his reincarnation of a tertiary degree life. I know that feelings, whereby no people you once idealize was found. It is kinda disappointing. However, life does not suit you entirely. Maybe that's the reason why am I here, to amazes the new generation and learn from the old generation as the intermediate generation. Wow, I certainly is a great man indeed by now..hahaha

Life in University is tough, whereby many times you face choices which requires you to make alone. The responsibility of the choices you made are you to bear now, every word you speak people will take it carefully and wait for chances to backstab or give a nice opera show while you acting as the valiant, a.k.a the bad guy. It is tough to get loyal friends. Yet I am glad that I found a bunch of loyal friends in life. I know it maybe too fast to acknowledge them as loyal friends but they indeed help me out a lot without I even realize. Thank God for placing me with such good friends and good people. How much more a sinner could ask? If God has given him mercy and grace in life. So do I

Thinking about future

My ex-housemate (Sony- Bryan) left to Singapore for internship. Too bad I couldn't see him and farewell to him face to face. Yet the books he left for me, I guess it is gonna be mine if he is still not coming back huh... Anyway, this matter gave me a lot of thought regarding my future. You see, what bryan focuses on was his URS and FYP. It turns out that university life can be achievable without busying yourself with a tons of other people's business ( Well, I never belong faculty that I served). Helping events may show that you are a team player, but turns out it does not really equip you with lab skills or latest information about biology field.

The most I get from events was just a bunch of people whereby I don't even close to, and some self-discipline skills as well as people skills especially dealing with woman that irritates you the most with her style. Self-justifying they are suppose to get angry and you should have listen to them in decision making. Well, why not we just keep our moral value high ground and do not talk about these broods of viper , gossip woman.

Events conflict taught me how to calm down, although there still need more training about that. It  generally gives me a picture, how to deal with people. Which is to lie. Be like them, show what they desire to see. They do not really interest by your real feelings. Instead, they just want people to prioritize them and give them full attention. That's what normally people said and so called a good leader.

In utar,  people whom so called utar just babysitting one another. They bear the job of swallowing every negative emotions in the people and wait people to expect done great deal. Wow, leaders in utar is tough isn't it? Not only need to care about your feelings, need to also act according your desire and let things done according your way. Bull shit everywhere.

To be concise, do not project yourself, the true nature but act like a gentlemen. Just act. Life is a show.

Anyway, because of Bryan. I was wondering whether to quit events or join an internship program in Taiwan to brush up some skills. Make a whole fuss again in my family meet-up. Still, I compromise. For after a several thoughts and enlightment by THE RULES TO BREAK - BOOK. I think, why not just enjoy what I have now and try out what I didn't?

Getting a girlfriend, hiking up a hill, when to a trip when friends, dota tournament together and lots of things to try in order finding my way to what I want. Take my time, don't just over confidence and make big talks about what dreams you have and goals to purse. Why not just list out what I have not try and we try it in university life. I can be a research professor at my thirties. I can get my house at my 40s but it is just my pace isn't it?

Eat a chill pill and see how things work out slowly which under the perfect will of God and quantum mechanics.